media update: January

CONFIDENTIAL TO G:  Skip movie review #13 (the last on the list, handily!), although the side notes are safe if you want to read those.

I hardly ever go to the movies anymore for a number of reasons---people are rude, movies are expensive, they come out on DVD about 4 months later anyway so what's the point of putting on a bra---but I went three times this month!  G, C, and I had to see the new Star Wars in the theater, of course, and then a lovely friend sent me a gift card, so I went twice on my own.

Asterisks denote something I particularly enjoyed or found especially worthy of my time; double asterisks are reserved for the creme de la creme.  As always, your mileage may vary.

FICTION

1. The Line Between by Tosca Lee:  After being kicked out of a doomsday cult, Wynter discovers that the world truly has gone to shit thanks to a mysterious virus that may have ties to her former life.

2. Long Bright River by Liz Moore:  Philadelphia beat cop Mickey and her sister Kacey have been at odds ever since Kacey spiraled into drug addiction.  A string of murders leads Mickey to fear for Kacey's safety, especially after Kacey disappears, and Mickey's off-the-books investigation could have dire consequences.

3. American Dirt by Jeanine Cummins:  After their entire family is gunned down by a drug cartel, Lydia and her young son Luca try to make their way across Mexico and to the safety of America.  I'm so white I'm transparent, so I don't feel qualified to comment on the controversy surrounding this book, but I will say I thought it was overrated.

4. The Prized Girl by Amy K. Green:  After Jenny, a former child pageant queen, is murdered, an older "fan" of hers is accused of the crime. Her half-sister Virginia doesn't think he did it, so she decides to look into it herself.

5. The Better Liar* by Tanen Jones:  In order to receive her inheritance, Leslie hires a woman to impersonate her dead sister; it does not go as expected.  Good and nasty.


NONFICTION

1. Camgirl by Isa Mazzei:  A memoir about the author's stint as an extremely popular camgirl.


MANGA/GRAPHIC NOVELS

1. Our Wonderful Days by Kei Hamuro

2. Food Wars!* vol. 33 by Yuto Tsukuda and Shun Saeki

3. Commute* by Erin Williams

4. What Did You Eat Yesterday? vol. 14 by Fumi Yoshinaga 

5. The Way of the House Husband* vol. 2 by Kousuke Oono


MOVIES

1. Hustlers*:  After the 2008 stock market crash, a group of strippers concoct a new way to make money.  Based on a true story, it's very entertaining and holy fucking shit is Jennifer Lopez hot in this.

2. Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels:  After a high-stakes poker game goes wrong, four friends have a week to come up with the cash or they're toast.

Side note: I don't think I've ever seen a movie with fewer women in it.  There are only three that I can remember: an unnamed stripper, an unnamed card dealer, and a druggie named Gloria.  There aren't even any women in the background shots!  I know Guy Ritchie doesn't exactly make chick flicks, and I don't absolutely require everything I watch to pass the Bechdel test (I'd never be able to watch martial arts movies otherwise), but damn.

3. Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker*:  Because this is the end of the newest trilogy, I won't give it a proper review lest I spoil someone.  I will say that I was expecting it to be hot garbage based on reviews and assorted Twitter wankery, but I actually enjoyed it!  Sure, there were some missteps here and there, but overall it was much better than I thought it would be. 

4. 47 Meters Down:  In this tense thriller, two sisters impulsively decide to do a shark cage dive in Mexico; this turns out to be an exceptionally bad idea.

5. Joker*:  Arthur Fleck (Joaquin Phoenix) is a failed stand-up comedian who's sick of being shit on by society.  When he impulsively performs a vigilante act on the subway, it puts him on the road to becoming the man who would eventually become Batman's biggest nemesis.  Grimy and disturbing; technically I'd give it 3 1/2 stars out of 5, but I rounded it up due to Phoenix's incredible performance.  I imagine he'll be the one to beat at the Oscars.

6. Ad Astra:  Astronaut Roy McBride (Brad Pitt) embarks on a dangerous mission to find out the truth about a project his father worked on.

7. Three Kings*:  After the end of the Gulf War, three soldiers find a map they think will lead them to gold stolen from Kuwait, and they set out to find it.  Excellent performances and acerbic humor.  I wasn't thrilled they featured my least favorite song in the world---I have been known to actually leave restaurants when it came on the sound system---but I'll forgive it.

8. Detective Pikachu:  After his estranged father's death, Tim goes to Ryme City, a place where humans and Pokemon coexist.  While there, he runs into his father's partner Pikachu, and they team up to investigate.  Cute and funny, with a great voice-over performance by Ryan Reynolds as Pikachu.

9. The Rundown:  A bounty hunter (Dwayne Johnson, though this movie is old enough that he's credited as The Rock) is sent to the Amazon to retrieve his boss' son (Seann William Scott), an aspiring treasure hunter looking for a priceless artifact.

10. Gemini Man:  A hit man (Will Smith) finds himself being stalked by an unusual foe.  It takes too long to get started, and it has some really distracting green screen work, but the exciting action scenes make up for it.

11. Underwater:  When a drilling station at the bottom of the ocean is breached, the survivors have to make their way across the sea floor to get to the main facility, but they've got company.  Basically Alien under the sea, but it's very tense; the first few minutes are pretty sedate, and then when shit goes down, it rarely lets up for the remainder of the movie.  I saw this in the theater and the surround sound really added to it.

12. It: Chapter 2*:  When Pennywise reappears 27 years after they first fought him, the Losers Club reunites to stop him for good.  I liked this one more than the first one; the cast is great, and there's a really scary scene where Bev revisits her old apartment and meets its new tenant.

13. 1917*:  In a race against time, two British soldiers are sent to deliver a message to stop their troops from walking into a trap.  It's done in one shot (or rather made to look that way, but it's seamlessly done aside from one obvious "cheat"), which adds to the intensity.

Side note #1: Forget what I said about movie #2 above, because this had even fewer women in it!  (One unnamed woman and one unnamed baby girl.)  Then again, it's set during a war in (spoiler alert) 1917, and I'm pretty sure there weren't a lot of women wandering around the battlefields.

Side note #2:  I got stuck with the worst goddamn audience for this movie.  I was the youngest person in there by at least 25 years, which is fine except it's not the audience you would have expected to be texting and talking throughout the whole thing.  The assholes behind me were especially loud, and at one point, when a cow showed up onscreen, one of them said "A cow!"  Wow, holy shit, I didn't know we had Dr. James Herriott in the audience!