this my shit, this my shit

Lord only knows where my digital camera is, so I’m taking the lazy way out to show you how I decked out my crib.





I plan on filling this bubble frame with pictures of genitalia cut out from Hustler as a scathing artistic critique of how pornography compartmentalizes human beings.

Nah, just messing with you. I’ll probably fill it with cool pictures I find here and there and the tiny figurines I got out of the gashopon machines in Japan.





The bedding under which I swelter.





K and I bought two chairs similar to this at Target the other night. Ours are covered with luxurious faux suede and look much nicer than this. We’re like Chandler and Joey without money! They’re quite comfortable; I sat in one last night and watched two episodes of “Teen Titans” back to back and didn’t feel any rods poking where they oughtn’t.

Uh huh huh…rods…

Oh, and I also bought a picture at Urban Outfitters, but I couldn’t find it on their website. It’s a black canvas with a pink flower and a mandala-looking thing in the corner. I’m all about the pomo in this new pad.

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Howdy Doody is annoying but efficient, and as such I have very little to do. Perhaps it is time for me to look into a lucrative career in aruspicy.

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I received this wonderful e-mail from G yesterday:

Er...Saturday, usual time? C & M invited us for a July 4th cookout and whichever local fireworks extravaganza we can get our eyes on, but since I know how much you hate BBQ food and sky-flowers, I told them thanks but no thanks and signed us up for a 10K charity run to benefit Apple Paltrow's impending private school education, which as everyone knows can be VERY expensive. (It's criminal, really.) No need to thank me, of course -- knowing you as well as I do, it was an easy decision, and the shin splints and blood in our lungs are all the gratitude I'll need. Sound good?

I said I would only consider watching fireworks if we could stand there gaping at them, going “uhhhhhh” like the zombies in Land of the Dead, and he said he would insist on it.

Have fun this weekend, y’all.

Peace out.