Thursday, July 28, 2011

the Shriners loaned us cars

We raced up and down the sidewalk twenty thousand million times.

Here's a survey stolen from my online amigo Peggy.

1. Favorite color?


2. Longest friendship?

Spock, who I've known since junior high. I can't remember whether we met in 7th or 8th grade, though.

3. Last gift you received?

The Las Vegas trip.

4. How many times have you dropped your cell?

A couple of times, most notably in the (freshly flushed, fortunately, and try to say that three times fast) toilet here at work. In an example of the most perfect timing ever, Yahoo had recently posted an article on how to save a wet cell phone, and it worked! My phone smelled like rice pilaf for a couple of weeks, but I like rice pilaf.

5. When's the last time you worked out?

If walking a mile counts, then 3:30PM today. If not, then Tuesday night, when I used my Wii Fit.

6. Thing you spend a lot of money on?


7. Last food you ate?

A bag of Cheez-Its.

8. First thing you notice about the opposite sex?

Honestly? Their shoes, because I have such a hard time making eye contact.

9. One favorite song?

As my title/opening line will attest, "She's An Angel" by They Might Be Giants.

10. Where do you live?

Southern California.

11. High school you attended:

One in Southern California.

12. Cell phone service provider:


13. Favorite mall store:

Sephora. I rarely wear makeup, but I am a slave to the smellies. I was there last Sunday and bought a rollerball of Donutella, one of Tokidoki's new fragrances.

14. Longest job ever had:

My current one. I've changed positions (say now!) numerous times, but I've been with the same company for 12 years. My shortest job was cashier at Media Play, but that was because they closed down my local store literally two months after opening it. The work itself was nothing thrilling, but I worked with some really cool people and got a 40% discount on just about everything, so that was aces at least.

15. Do you own a pair of dice?


16. Do you prank call people?

No, but I was known to call my high school crushes and then hang up squealing before anyone answered. This was pre-caller ID, of course.

17. Last wedding attended?

I don't even remember. I think I've only been to three weddings in my entire life!

18. First person you'd call if you won the lottery:


19. Last time you attended church:

College. My friend L was religious, and she knew I was agnostic, but she asked me to come to a special service at a predominantly African-American church. If more churches were like that one, I'd probably go just for the entertainment value! I don't mean that in a snide way; the singing was amazing and the food afterwards was excellent. I also appreciated the fact that the sermon focused on love and acceptance rather than "OMG you did x and y and now God hates you."

20. Favorite pastimes:

Reading, movies, and video games.

21. Biggest lie you have heard?

Drawing a blank.

23. Where's your favorite place to eat with friends?

A local BBQ joint.

24. Can you cook?

BRB, LOLing forever.

25. What car do you drive?

2008 Honda Civic. His name is Ginji.

26. First celebrity crush?

Harrison Ford.

27. Last time you cried?

Sunday during Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2. I cried several times, but one scene in particular left me borderline dehydrated. I'll just say one word which won't spoil it for anyone who hasn't seen/read it, but those of you who have will know instantly what I'm talking about: "Always." Floods and floods of tears.

28. Most disliked food:

Onions are the devil's own vegetable. And they're in everything! And you can't just pick them off because they permeate everything with their foul juices. I think one of the reasons I love sweets so much is that you ain't never gonna find onions in no goddamn creme brulee.

29. Thing you like most about yourself?

I think I'm moderately smart and funny.

30. Thing you dislike most about yourself:

I'm going to focus purely on non-physical things, because if I included appearance-related things, this would take forever. I hate my temper, my inability to let things go, my impatience, and my raging misanthropy.

(Oddly enough, there was no 31 on the list. I even went back and double checked Peggy's entry to be sure I didn't skip one.)

32. Longest shift you have worked at a job?

17 hours. No, that's not a typo. I opened for Blockbuster one morning, and then the closing manager never showed up. I called every other store and begged for someone to come relieve me, but no dice. So I was there from 8AM to 1AM, on a fucking SATURDAY, back in the days before Netflix when people would actually GO to Blockbuster. And hey, I got to open again the next morning! Wheeee!

33. Favorite movie?

I can never decide on one, but if I absolutely had to pick one, I would go with Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers, which I saw 3 1/2 times in the theater. (The half comes from seeing it with Spock in Lancaster at a dingy dollar theater, and the film broke halfway through and they weren't able to fix it.)

34. Can you sing?

Wow no!

35. Last concert?

John Williams at the Hollywood Bowl.

36. Last kiss?

Monday morning.

37. Last movie rented?

I started watching Life During Wartime, the newest Todd Solondz movie, last night but had to turn it off because I was starting to pass out. I must say, watching Paul Reubens (aka Pee-Wee Herman) spitting "Eat shit, you fucking c---!" in a woman's face literally made me jerk back against the couch in shock.

38. Thing you never leave home without?

My purse.

39. Favorite vacation spot?


40. Do you like Chinese food?

My options are somewhat limited due to my aversion to most vegetables, but I love lemon/orange chicken.

42. Is your room clean?

I keep my bedroom pretty clean. It's the living room where crap tends to accumulate.

43. Laptop or desktop computer?

Laptop at home, desktop at work.

44. Favorite comedian?

George Carlin. (RIP)

45. Do you smoke?

I had a brief dalliance with cigarettes as a teenager, but quit when I realized my dad would kick my ass if he found out.

46. Sleep with or without clothes?

With. I usually wear a t-shirt and yoga pants.

47. Who sleeps with you every night?

It's just me except on the weekend.

48. Long distance relationships work?

It really depends on the people involved. Never worked for me personally, though.

49. How many times have you been pulled over by the police?

Three: once for turning right on red (there was a sign posted, which I didn't notice), once for going a whopping three miles above the speed limit, and once for doing a "California stop" (i.e. just barely slowing down at a stop sign and then coasting right through). I got tickets the first two times, and the third cop let me off with a warning.

50. Pancakes or french toast?

French toast, but G's mom makes some bombdiggity blueberry pancakes.

51. Do you like coffee?

I don't drink it on a regular basis, but once or twice a year, I get a major craving for it.

52. How do you like your eggs?


53. Do you believe in astrology?

No, but I still read my horoscope every morning.

54. Last person you talked to on the phone?

Daddy-O, who is currently vacationing on the Jersey Shore. I told him to give Snooki a fist bump for me, and then spent the next five minutes patiently explaining who Snooki is.

55. Last person on your missed call list?

My credit card company.

56. What was the last text message you received?


57. McDonald's or Burger King?

Burger King.

58. Number of pillows?

I only use one when I sleep, but I have four on my bed. I use the other three to prop myself up when I read in bed.

59. What are you wearing right now?

What are YOU wearing, handsome?

...okay, fine. I'm wearing a navy blue shirt with white accents around the neck and sleeves, jeans, sneakers, socks, and the usual undergarments. Perfume of the day: Diptyque.

60. Pick a lyric, any lyric or song?

From Magnetic Fields: "The cactus where your heart should be/has lovely little flowers/and though it's always pricking me/my ardor never sours."

61. What kind of jelly do you like on your PB & J sandwich?


62. Can you play pool?


63. Do you know how to swim?

I can doggy paddle well enough, but that's about it.

64. Favorite ice cream?

Unfortunately, several of my favorites are either impossible to find (blue moon) or retired (Ben & Jerry's Uncanny Cashew, Archer Farms Sea Salt Caramel Pretzel). But I love pistachio. It has to be that unnatural green color, though.

65. Do you like maps?

Only in the Silent Hill universe, because they have the best mapping system of any video game ever.

66. Tell me a random fact about yourself:

I can hold a piece of popcorn in my dimple.

68. Ever attend a theme party?


69. What is your favorite season?


70. Last time you laughed at something stupid?

This happens on a near-constant basis.

71. What time did you wake up this morning?


72. Best thing about winter?

It's cool enough to walk outside without sweating like a virgin at a whorehouse.

73. Last time a cop gave you a ticket?


75. Name of your first pet?

Pixie, a monstrous little bitch of a hamster. But she was pregnant when we got her---surprise!---and she had an enormous litter, only one of which I was allowed to keep. (Don't worry, the others were donated to the pet store. And yes, they probably became snake food, but let me have my delusions that they were all adopted by nice families.) I named that one Honey Bunny, and she was as sweet as her name.

76. Do you think pirates are cool or overrated?

Pirates are cool, but will never be as cool as ninja.

77. What are you going to have for dinner tonight?

A can of Annie's organic cheesy ravioli.

79. What is the third letter of your name?

First or last? Well, I guess it doesn't matter, since the answer is the same: R.

80. How old are your pets?

I have no pets because of my stupid lease. Occasionally, I'll get all "RAWR must touch cat" and G will take me to the local shelter, where they have a special room where a selected group of mellow cats will mill around and you can pet them with abandon. They also have a separate area for cats who must remain caged for whatever reason, and one time they had a 4-week-old gray kitten and I just about exploded in a shower of glitter. I turned to G and said, "I would name her Tanpopo [Japanese for dandelion] because her head is fluffy." Yes, I name pets I don't even have.

81. What color is your backpack?

I have no backpack.

82. Are you sick?

My sense of humor sure is.

84. Is the bathroom open?

...uh, sugar in the what now?

87. Are you smiling?

No. I am at work.

88. Do you have eyeliner on?


89. Do you miss someone right now?

I miss a lot of people.

90. If you could go anywhere in the world where would you go?

The Seychelles.

91. Do you have a Myspace? Do you have a Live Journal?

No to both.

92. Are you in high school?

Darling, I'm FORTY.

93. Do you have a crush?

Christina Hendricks.

94. What is your favorite nickname for yourself?

G has one for me that I'm not going to share because it's private, but one that I AM willing to share is Donut. Only my dad calls me that, though.

95. What color is your bathing suit?


97. Did you go on vacation last month?


98. Have you ever been on a cruise?


99. Do you have a sister?


100. Are you upstairs?

I'm on the second floor of a three-story building.